10/13/10

10/13/10. Thirteen has always been my lucky number.

On October 11, 2010, after being off bed rest for 11 days, I went out on a crazy fun day with my Chloë. We went to the mall, shopped up a storm, played around, ran, had lunch together, and still made time to go to the Pumpkin Patch after nap. By the time I got home that evening, I didn't think too much of the wave of constant contractions that had come over me. I had been having contractions for weeks, so this wasn't new. What I didn't realize until I was out again--this time at the mall by myself once Chloë had gone to bed--was that these contractions were about 4-5 minutes apart, and could technically lead to labor. I went home, called Dr. F. who instructed me to up my dose of medication and see if we could buy a few more days. I was 37 weeks and 3 days. The next two days that followed were uncomfortable, and full of moments when we thought "this is it!" However, it wasn't until Wednesday morning, on October 13, 2010, that I realized we were having a baby. We had an appointment with Dr. F. at 1pm, and he pushed it earlier. As I got dressed, I packed as if we were heading to the hospital, which alarmed Josh a little, but he quickly got on board.

The 45 minute car ride to Dr. Fr's office, as well as our short time in the waiting room was filled with contractions every 5 minutes. It didn't take Dr. F. more than a couple of minutes to look at me, smile, and ask me if I was ready to have a baby. With that, we headed to the hospital, knowing that in a few hours, we'd get to meet our little boy.

After waiting for about five hours before they could take us to the operating room, at 5:33pm we got to meet our newest miracle: Lucas. He was born at 37 weeks and 5 days, full term, weighing in at 7 lbs 4 oz, measuring 19 3/4 long, with a full head of dark hair. He cried as they got him out, and Josh got to hold him right away. Once I was back in the room, it wasn't long before they brought him to me, and as I put him close to my chest, he instinctively started eating. The feeling of being able to hold my baby right after birth, in my room, with me, is something I wasn't prepared for. It was what I had always dreamed of, and the impact of having that dream come true was overwhelming.

Our first night, I think I held Lucas most of the time Josh wasn't busy on diaper duty. It was magical. It has now been a little over two weeks, and it is still magical. All those long days on bed rest, all the worries, all the frustration...they have all melted away as I hold my baby boy, my other little miracle. It was all worth it. And as I have said, over and over, words just can't describe it.


Lucas, a couple of hours old.


Lucas, one week old.


My two babies.

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miracles

Both of my pregnancies have resulted in such unprecedented miracles, I get overwhelmed just thinking about it. Today, I'm particularly overwhelmed. Chloë, my first miracle, was conceived years after I had been told I may never be able to have a baby--she was conceived after many tears, and challenges and that first pregnancy had its own obstacles which we successfully overcame. When she was born, a few days before she reached 34 weeks, I remember aching to hear her first cry, and crying myself when her little voice filled the room. That was a little over two years ago, and as I sit here today, particularly overwhelmed, I am filled with tremendous joy as I revel in this second miracle--a full term baby. I am having a full term baby!

When I realized I might be pregnant, and a day later Dr. F. confirmed that, yes, amazingly, I was pregnant, I knew we'd have a tough road ahead of us. During the first trimester, Dr. F., always the optimist, never stated for sure that I'd need bed rest, but whenever I broached the subject, I could see it in his eyes as he urged me to just enjoy each day as much as possible, and take it easy. He didn't have to say it, we both knew it.

When bed rest arrived at 20 weeks, Josh and I embarked on one of the hardest journeys of our lives together. We lived through 16 weeks of bed rest. We survived it, we fought it, and we made it. It was hard, unexpectedly hard at times, and Josh has been a rock--I don't have words to express how much I appreciate, and love all that he has done for me and Chloë during these last four months. It hasn't been easy on any of us, and he deserves a star--a whole universe!--named after him, for always maintaining his calm, for being my EVERYTHING, and most importantly, for always having faith, especially when my own faith would sometimes flicker.

So, today, we are 37 weeks, and I have a full term baby in my belly. Words cannot describe the emotions that fill my heart; words cannot describe how truly thankful I am for an amazing daughter, a phenomenal husband, and this tremendous miracle that I'm carrying inside me. I'm simply overwhelmed, and loving every minute of it.

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the bright side

in the last week our car ended up in the shop, our house flooded, and Chloë has a double ear infection. However, we are STILL pregnant! 36 weeks and 3 days pregnant to be exact.

When I turned 36 weeks, I got my cerclage removed, and was officially taken off bed rest! While my mobility is still somewhat compromised because everything HURTS from four months of laying on my bum, this is HUGE. A momentous occasion which we celebrated with a date night! I actually got to leave the house and not worry about whether walking from the car to the restaurant would cause me to go into labor. It was wonderful, everything I imagined freedom would be like. I felt like I was walking on air, with fairies and butterflies following my every move, and rainbows paving the way. It felt *that* magical. More magical than that was picking up my Chloë after 4 months. The look of utter delight on her face when I offered to pick her up is something I will NEVER forget. She was beyond happy, and kept saying "Wook at me, mommy!" as if I didn't know what we were doing. Oh, I knew..everything hurt, but it was all worth it.

As if I couldn't get any happier, I also realized that bed rest made me love being pregnant. While I love the result of pregnancy, I've never been one of those women who delight themselves in the actual being pregnant part of the whole thing. I don't like the maternity clothes, I despise the constant peeing, I hate it when people stare, when strangers and acquaintances want to touch your belly, oh! and morning sickness, let's not even go there! The list could go on, and on (and on...) However, yesterday I realized that I am LOVING being pregnant. The horrible back discomfort, the hip aches, and insane sciatic nerve pain *almost* don't bother me, because I keep thinking that I am so incredibly pregnant, and I'm just thrilled! So, in the grand scheme of things, all the craziness going on in our household, is entirely secondary to the fact that our little boy is still safely inside!

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