a pat on the back (my back!) and to many more!

so, 6 months came and went..and I forgot to congratulate myself on making it to month 6 of breastfeeding! Everything about BFing was such a challenge to me in the beginning, I kept saying "If I can only make it one more day" and each day would come and I'd be in a state of mixed joy and dread. Joy that I was able to stick it out one more day, and dread because of the huge drama BFing was for a preemie who didn't like to suck properly and preferred her bottles. I set little goals for myself, and they kept getting loftier, and loftier, until there were no more goals, and just enjoyment. After she started getting more awake, Chloë became better at the breast, and after we were happier with her weight, we ditched the bottle (of expressed breast milk she was getting after each nursing section) figuring it was becoming more of a clutch, and actually preventing her from purely enjoying the breast. That took about a week, and she finally stopped wanting the bottle, and actually taking more from the breast. We had many ups and downs in the beginning, everything from low milk supply as a result of BC pill to being sick and not being able to take anything in case it led to MORE low supply..Chloë also had a nursing strike for 3 days which drove me to the brink of depression. With the help of her wonderful nanny we got back on track. So now we're almost at 7 months, and for about 2-3 months I've finally got to the point where I truly, TRULY, really do LOVE nursing my babe. And here are the top 10 reasons why breast is best for me:

1. I always know when she's hungry I can give her food that *I* make, from my OWN body--how amazing is that?
2. When she is a little tired, she likes to suckle for a comfort after she eats and she'll fall asleep while still holding on
3. When she gets pleasantly full, she'll look up at me, while still attached to my breast, and smile, and as she does, milk will dribble from the side of her mouth
4. She likes to put one hand behind my back and the other on my chest
5. Sometimes with the hand that's on my chest she'll play with my mouth and if I kiss her little hands she smiles and wants more
6. Other times with the hand that's behind my back, she'll inch it closer to the breast and just sort of tickle me
7. And at other times still, she'll play with my necklace, the necklace that holds a Leo pendant that once belonged to my father
8. When all else fails, and she's being super Ms. Cranky pants, I'll put her to the breast and she'll immediately calm down
9. Similarly, when we have to go for the torturous visits at the ped. when they have to give her shots, I put her to the breast right after and she immediately forgets the horrible experience she just had
10. And lastly...I just ADORE spending those quiet moments staring at her, while she stares at me, those moments when I could just about burst with so much love for my little babe, my little pumpkin girl.

And here's what I wish daddy could do for those times in the middle of the night when I can barely stay awake

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